Artichokes are for Lovers

In honor of V-day, let's jump right into a plant with many layers of complicated, tough outer leaves which reveal a fuzzy, tender heart at its center. One might say this perennial thistle is a metaphor for the woman in all of us. And what better time to use a cliché metaphor than on Valentine’s Day?

If you haven't eaten an entire artichoke before, that's what you do. Peel off a leaf, turn it over so the soft part is parallel to your bottom teeth and scrape off the meat. So artichokes aren't technically an aphrodisiac, but if you're repeating this action several times on Feb. 14th, my guess is that your partner will get the idea. And not only are they S-E-X-Y, but artichokes aid in digestion, strengthen the liver and gall bladder. What's sexier than a healthy gall bladder?


The best choke I ever ate was at a restaurant in Williamsburg (Moto) where they steamed it--I think in lemon juice--so that it was limp, lifeless and tender, and served with saffron mayonnaise. Yep, that was the same night I was aggressively accosted on the dance floor at The Woods, but you see? Artichokes almost act as love cologne.

Below is NOT the same recipe from Moto, but here’s how I make artichokes. (It's still prettah good.)

Ingredients:

1 artichoke per person
per choke:
2 tablespoons of olive oil
1/8 cup breadcrumbs
few shakes of Parmesan cheese
juice of 1/2 a lemon
enough boiling water to submerge the choke


Step one: cut off the stem of the artichoke, leaving about a half inch at the bottom. Then cut off the tip of the V (giving it kind of a flat top look and revealing some of the inner layers.) Then go through and cut the stickers out of the rest of the outer leaves (holding my knife diagonally to the choke). Separate and rinse through the leaves as best you can.




Step two: Submerge in boiling water or steamer and steam for 30-40 minutes. Check periodically. If you can peel off a leave easily and the meat is tender, it's done.

Step three: Remove from boiling water. Place in an oven-safe dish or baking pan (however it can stay upright). Separate the steaming leaves a little more and drizzle olive oil. Sprinkle bread crumbs, sprinkle Parmesan cheese (eyeball all this, but try to get a little bit between each layer).



Step four: Place in oven set to 350 degrees. Bake for about 15 minutes

Step five: Remove, sprinkle lemon juice over everything.

Once you've peeled and scraped all the leaves, you get to the heart (the best part). Trim off all the fuzz and dip it in the leftover olive oil/breadcrumb/Parmesan that's leftover in your dish.

If your hands aren't covered in olive oil and Parmesan, then you're probably not that fun to hang out with and you don't deserve a Valentine. Hmph.

Winter Warmer Veggie Lasagna

We're weeks away from spring, so there's only one way to enjoy the last few days of chilly weather: Carb Load.

I made this a few weeks ago at Wolison's for a few reasons:
1. I don't have a lasagna tray
2. It was another slushy, cold day and we both needed something that would stick to our ribs (she more than I, as she's training for a marathon. I'm just training for maternity wear.)
3. ALev told me that morning she was making lasagna in Atlanta, and it really tempted my palette.

I didn't have time to find a recipe because Wolison told me she had an 8:45 bedtime, so I just got the no-boil pasta from Trader Joe's and winged it.

Ingredients:
1 box no boil pasta
1 small tub of ricotta cheese
1/2 bag frozen spinach, thawed
grilled eggplant and zucchini (i took some help and got this from the frozen section, but you could certainly break out the old Forman and grill your own veggies).
1 package Mozzarella cheese (do yourself a favor, and don't get low-fat. If you're being bad, go all.the.way--there's a certain couple whose name rhymes with Fauers I'm talking to.)
1 jar of marinara sauce (or any tomato sauce you prefer)
1 package baby Portabello mushrooms, washed, chopped, sauteed in olive oil.
1/2 cup grated Parmesan for the top.

Prep (this is real loose, so i'm going to write it that way):
--saute the mushrooms in olive oil
--mix the spinach with the ricotta (eyeball it, but I just did equal parts)
--thaw or grill veggies

Layers:
Bottom of the dish: thin coat of marinara sauce
Layer 1: Pasta, 1/4 of sauce jar, grilled eggplant and zucchini. Thin layer of grated Mozzarella.
Layer 2: Pasta, spinach mixed equal parts with Ricotta cheese. More sauce.
Layer 3: Pasta, sauteed baby portabello mushrooms, remainder of sauce, remainder of grated mozzerella, a couple handfuls of grated Parmesan. Maybe some black pepper on top.

Baked in the oven for 45 minutes at 375 degrees, and voila--this is what it looks like inside:


Warning: Elastic waist pants may be necessary after consumption.

I'm not alone

Alice Waters Will Not Abide Anyone's Love for Iceberg Lettuce

Photo: Courtesy Amazon

From NYmag.com:

"In a new memoir by Times staffer Kim Severson, there's a story in which Alice Waters schools her friend and mentor Marion Cunningham, who admits to being a fan of iceberg lettuce. As SFoodie reports, Spoon Fed: How Eight Cooks Saved My Life recounts the life lessons the former Chron food writer learned from a group of female cooks, including Waters, Cunningham, Rachael Ray, and Ruth Reichl. We suppose the lesson from Waters goes something like, 'Don't be afraid to judge your friends, or to mail them a box of crunchy heirloom lettuces from France in order to shame them out of their plebeian tastes.' The book is out on April 15th."

From: http://sanfrancisco.grubstreet.com/2010/03/alice_waters_cannot_abide_iceb.html

If you think sardines are disgusting, I think you're disgusting

Welcome back! There are several excuses for my absence (new job*, move 1, move 2, move 3, The Office marathons and the new Vampire Weekend album), but you'll be relieved to know that I live and breathe and occasionally cook. I'm still getting my new kitchen warmed up for some unbelievable culinary masterpieces, so until then, I'll share some low-impact meals I've recently enjoyed.

Sardines on the half shell
I don't want to hear from you that sardines are disgusting. They are a delicacy. A del-i-ca-cy. (Esther, back me up). This is what we call a delicate lunch where I'm from:
1. buy boneless, skinless sardiness in a tin from any local supermarket

2. toast your best bread.
3. mash sardines over top of bread and squeeze A TON of lemon juice (at least a table spoon per half slice of bread).
4. align thinly sliced onions on top
5. enjoy.

And to go with it, we have a simple little salad you can serve as a side to anything fishy. I like to call this:

Don't you wish it was Spring Salad
No real measurements on this one, just eyeball it to your own preference.


Ingredients are:
chickpeas
cucumber diced
grape tomatoes halved
calamata olives chopped
lemon juice
olive oil
salt
black pepper
Mix together and serve.

And finally, a relatively inexpensive organic wine that I found to be worthy of purchase, when cost to taste ratio was measured:

Stay warm!

*This post brought to you by snow day.

Greens, Groins and Guest Granola

Courtesy of Alison, inspired by many of my family members requesting her homemade granola recipe.

Hello, Health-Nuts! I'm one of Jessica's dearest friends, and shockingly also a consumer of medium-rare meat, white pasta and copious amounts of dairy products. However since I've had the opportunity to live with our chef in close quarters, I have come to love body-and-mind-conscious cooking (some of my faves being: Cotes du Rhone, Brussels Sprouts and Salmon with lemon and bread crumbs). This holiday season I was looking for something small I could make and package to give to my co-workers that would show my dedication to wellness living (a contrast to last year's gift of blocks of fudge). I stumbled upon this lovely blog with this lovely recipe:

Now, if you're like me and blow this up to full size, you will see some of the measurements are rather hard to read. This might lead to putting in double the amount of honey and double the amount of brown sugar. Some people call these "happy accidents." The only thing that really happens is you come out with more of a granola bar with sticky fingers rather than granola you sprinkle in your non-fat greek yogurt.

So, ed note for sprinkely granola:
1/4 cup of honey
3/4-ish cup brown sugar
1/3-ish cup of the add-ins

I omitted the dried cherries and substituted them with dark chocolate chips (some habits never die). I also used a plastic spatula instead of a metal one (it's a recession).

Everyone at work seemed to love it, claiming they ate "half the bag before lunch!" (it was a snack sized bag, c'mon). I tested both versions out in the Berkshires, in oatmeal and on my couch, and I have to say it proved delicious in all scenarios. Here's to snacking!

Greens Day: Collards

Here at G+G, we're a little bit Jewish, a little bit Southern Rock. So it's hard for me to believe I have thus far neglected one of the core greens that exist on God's earth and in my home: collards.

Traditionally collard greens are a staple of southern cuisine, stewed in a vat with ham hock and served with black eyed peas and corn bread ala Paula Dean. But here's where the Jewish part comes in--ain't no way we making anything with ham hock. Esther has been making vegetarian collard greens since all you's were stars in heaven. And she ain't stoppin' now.

The method used to cook collards is similar to our old friend kale, but the difference is that collards need longer too cook and we add onions. Collards are more flat, less leafy. However like kale, collards are packed with nutrients including B6 and C, carotenes, chlorophyll, and manganese. One cup of collard greens provides more than 70 percent of the RDA for vitamin C (according to my source on the web).

When making collards, first I get a bunch, wash them and cut them in thick chiffonade style.

Then I chop 3-4 cloves of garlic and 1 small onion.

Then I add about 2-3 tables spoons of olive oil to a pan on medium heat.

Add onions and garlic. Let cook for about 5 minutes.

THEN add collards:

COVER and let cook for at least 10 minutes, checking often. They'll cook down. While you wait, check out my Gator-themed Hannukah candles:


Now, after 10 minutes, add:
-2 tablespoons Braggs or soy sauce
-1 1/2 tablespoons dry sherry
-a few splashes of plum wine vinegar
-black pepper to taste
-(whatever other seasonings you feel like)

Mix, cover and turn to low. Let steam for another 5 minutes. Should look like this when done (notice the green is a little deeper and duller as compared when you first put them in the pot. This is the color of 'done.' Try a bite just to make sure it's not chewy) :



Should look like this on your plate with a sweet potato latke:

Happy Hannukah, y'all.

Back to Basics: Tofu Stir-Steam

I realize readers haven't had a new recipe in weeks, and with all the crap we're eating during holiday season, wouldn't it be great to have a nice clean, warm dish to get us through the winter? I think so.
So here's my tofu stir-steam. It's not really a stir fry because I don't use a wok, I use very little oil and I cover the pot so the veggies steam more than fry. Stir fries are so easy, but sometimes you forget about them in a pinch for dinner ideas. Here's what I used:

1 TBS olive oil
1 small onion chopped
3-4 cloves of garlic chopped or minced
1 package button mushrooms rinsed, chopped
1 package broccoli florets
2 stalks celery chopped diagonally
2 carrots chopped diagonally
1 package of extra firm tofu diced to your liking
1/4 cup of Bragg's Amino acids (or 1/8 cup soy sauce to taste)
1/4 cup dry sherry
black pepper to taste
1 TBS sesame seeds (0ptional)
dry parsley to taste (optional)
1/2 lemon (optional)

Prep:

This is pretty easy. Put the oil in a large pan on medium-high heat. Saute onions and garlic for about 3 minutes or until onions are slightly transparent. Add broccoli, celery, carrots. Cover and steam for about 5-8 minutes, tossing often. When veggies are sweating, add tofu and mushrooms. Add Braggs, sherry, black pepper. Toss a lot and cover again for another 5 minutes. Keep checking and tossing to make sure its getting cooked evenly. Here's what it looks like in the pan before it cooks down:

These guys said they were integral in this recipe and didn't want to be left out:

Add sesame seeds, lemon, parsley and whatever other spices you have hiding. Finally, serve over brown Basmati rice that's been cooked in coconut oil, add a lemon wedge and a slice of avocado for good measure: